it's officially 88 more days before i'm going to see him in Hawaii!!
slightly less than 3 months!! i'm so looking forward..

Moving from the previous post,
my mood more or less back to usual liao..
i'm wondering if it was PMS.. it would be..
but just a very terrible one..

i actually had a not too bad birthday..

celebrations started with dinner with xian and rl on thurs..
but with that sucky mood.. we just had dinner and headed home..

i was still a happy little princess on that day..
had dinner with mum at inagiku..
pictures are in facebook.. check them out..
then we went upstairs to city space..
i LOVE the view and the ambience...
would be better if someone was here..
i'll WAIT!! hahahaha..
we got home abt 1+am and slept at 3+ only..
therefore, i spent half on my sat in lala world..

then i went for a movie..
mamma mia is not too bad..
i love the songs.. so retro..
hahaha.. abba.. super troupers.. money money.. and lots more!!

sunday morning service then...
laptop shopping.. i have a new dell xps!!
hahahaha..

a little tabulation of my birthday prezzies this year..
- dinner from xian and rl
- lunch from lala
- tinkerbelle crystal from xian (so pretty.. love it..)
- grey beaded clutch bag from mum (totally for dinner!! love it!!)
- beige COACH bag from dear!! (I LOVE IT!!)
- beige agnes b lunch bag from uni mates (love u all..)
- Taka vouchers worth $160 from colleagues.. (shopping.. finally. hahaha..)
- Ang bao from dad (can be more.. hahahaha..)

i hope it's still pending for more to come.. hahahaha..

i took urgent leave for reno yesterday..
and it's done but my house stinks..
and went to check out abt the shop..
looks good but the price isn't so right..
really need to come out with the proposal real soon!!

i think i'm sinking into depression..

i am tearing at everything, everywhere..
i HATE THIS EMOTIONAL STATE OF MYSELF!!
i NEED TO PULL MYSELF OUT OF THIS!!

i miss the cheery me..
i miss the nonsense me..
i miss the happy me..

what is happening to me??
can somebody tell me why life seems so miserable suddenly..
is it really because of the job??
i really dont know...
piecing me life together now seems like i'm standing in the centre of nowhere..
AIMLESSLY!!

ARGHZ!!!! What happened!!
it feels like a birthday that i totally have no mood to celebrate..
this is so not ME!!
can someone think so something to pull me back to think positively.. PLEASE..

God, i haven been a good girl..
i haven been faithful and devoted..
i pray that u will help me get back to you..
and help me put everything into ur hands.. and out of my mind..
i pray for u to gather pple to 'save' me..
i need ur blessings father.. ur mercy over me..
in the most wonderful name of jesus..
amen.

FAN!!!
i feel like i'm going to breakdown..
i'm lost in direction and all i get is the question keep getting push back to me..

all i need is support that i can feel at least..
i know dear has been supportive..
and others have been asking me to think through it first..
but when i turn to mum to ask for a definite answer, she keep pushing it back to me..
and giving me the u want to quit then quit lor kind of answer..
what kind of support is that??
i dont feel any bit of support from there at all..

i was thinking.. is it me or the job or the pple..
am i being too complacent??? am i being too spoilt??
am i too princess?? am i too this am i too that??
wat am i good for?? wat is my purpose in life??
am i not the cut to work for others??

i really don know.. can anyone give me an answer??
i feel so tired mentally.. i feel like just hiding in a corner and cry my heart out..
i feel like just leaving everything behind and go into hiding..
i don want to face reality any longer..

one week past real soon..
yet really very difficult..
i miss u so much dear..
have been thinking of so many ways and means to get myself closer to u..
but nothing seems realistic..

Ever since we had been talking abt the coffee business my heart is no longer telling me to work..
I got the urge to leave..
The urge to tender..
And lead a carefree life..
Which then I’ll be able to detailed research in the business..

I feel like flying there now to just be by your side..
It’s totally not a good sign when u dread to go work.. dozing off at work.. and not in the mood to work..
Maybe I had not enough break after I finish school..
I need a break.. a longer break..
Have been feeling so tired.. and unhealthy recently..
Getting giddy spells so often and feeling restless.. Haiz..
Maybe the life of ‘tai tai’ is really my cup of tea..
But is my dearest other half going to ‘yang’ me?? Hahahaha…

Had been so upset with the people ard me recently..
From Singtel to LG to DHL..
Haiz.. they have all been getting scolded by me..
My new phone has been giving me hell of problems..
And when I’m trying to send things to him, DHL has to piss me off too..
Irritating..
I really wonder has my temper got anything got to do with what I’m going thru..
Temper really hasn’t been good..

I’m counting down to December… and that’s when we’ll meet again..

You won't know what happens if you dont even try..

It is important to get hold of every chance to
gain your own happiness..
Once missed could be forever gone..
Love is everywhere in the air!


Little Princess Marilyn
19 September


*truckload of happiness
*chest of gold
*more travel
car (as long as it has 4 wheels & can move)





a walk to the palace of photos
memories of the Princess and her Prince
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Simply Princess!


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